One goal

One Goal

In the last few episodes, we have been diving deeper into three simple ideas: that each one of us has a fundamental need to express our uniqueness; that each one of us has a fundamental need to cultivate meaningful relationships with others, and that it is possible to choose one goal for our lives. Remember, fulfilling a basic need takes care of the necessities required to stay alive. A fundamental need relates to something deeper that contributes to our mental and emotional well-being. These two fundamental needs provide us with a sense of grounding in our own true nature (uniqueness), as well as a sense of belonging (connection).

Why one goal? Having a clear goal may not seem necessary, but without goals we often feel like we are aimless and that our life does not have much meaning. Moreover, it may feel like it is hard to find reasons to do anything or even to stay alive. A goal offers us inspiration and motivation to keep moving forward. We can understand a goal as a direction for us to follow. Like with anything in life, the simpler our goal, the easier it will be to assess if we are moving in that direction or if we are off track. This simplicity is enhanced by choosing one goal so that it will be easier to remember it and to establish clear priorities.

In the Two Fundamental Needs and One Goal episode, we already suggested one goal: Enhancing the quality of our participation in our lives. Let’s explore this goal in more detail. We have already suggested that being present is both the essence and the goal of yoga. Being present has two aspects, the Being aspect, when we are in open awareness, witnessing the ever-changing flow of experiences; and the Doing aspect, our conscious participation in whatever we are undertaking. These two aspects are deeply intertwined and complementary, for instance, in our breathing processes, there is a more active phase, the inhalation requiring action, and the more passive phase, the exhalation, which in its natural state does not require much effort at all. Respiration does not work if there is only inhalation or only exhalation, both its being and doing components are necessary for respiration to happen and to facilitate many metabolic processes. Similarly, we know that yoga does not ask that we abstain from participating in our lives. It is a simple and practical thing, because most of us need to participate in life.

Returning to this first aspect of our goal, we are choosing to participate in our lives. Indeed, our goal is to participate in our lives consciously, so that the quality of our participation is optimal. In other words, we are using our awareness for enhancing the quality of our participation in whatever we do. As we cultivate our awareness, we recognize that awareness expresses both attention and openness. As a result, we avoid being deluded by our beliefs and preferences, and thus we can fulfill our first fundamental need, participating by expressing our uniqueness. It could be possible to interpret uniqueness as superficial gestures to indicate to others that we are different. However, the uniqueness suggested here is born from the recognition that each one of us is already a unique expression of awareness. In other words, we do not have to prove that we are unique. This realization empowers us to let go of the perceptual filters that cloud our awareness, it also frees us from all pretenses, so that we can express ourselves authentically. Besides, being aware in the moment helps us appreciate the uniqueness of each moment.

We create a single goal, enhancing the quality of our participation in life by expressing our uniqueness. This first aspect of our goal assists us in fulfilling our first fundamental need. The second aspect of our life goal relies on acknowledging that we are not isolated, that each one of us has always existed in relation to everything that exists. In fact, we cannot live all by ourselves. After the 2020 pandemic it became clearer that social isolation has powerful negative effects on our physical, mental, and psychological health. As we participate in our lives, our participation means that we meet others and that, because we are powered by our awareness, we can recognize that each person we meet is also unique, and that each one of them is, quite likely, doing the best that they can. Even when we reflect on our own lives, we know that we have made many mistakes and that we have learned many things, meaning that even though we had an intention to do the best that we could, now we know better. It is the same for everybody. Consequently, our wholehearted participation in our lives is also fulfilling our second fundamental need, to forge meaningful relationships.

Revisiting our goal: Using our awareness for enhancing the quality of our participation in our lives by expressing our uniqueness with kindness and compassion toward ourselves, towards the people around us and toward everything in existence. Notice that this goal seems rather general. However, it is still applicable, we can put it into practice at every point in our lives regardless of where we may be. Whatever we are doing we can ask ourselves: How is this thought, intention, action, or interaction enhancing the quality of my participation in this moment? Notice that caring for the quality of your participation already hints at the need to be open-minded, free of pretense and preemptive judgments. It also invites you to be open-hearted, so that you can look at yourself with kindness and compassion. And can you extend your kindness and compassion to others in recognition that they are also trying to be the best version of themselves that they can be? That they also are trying to move toward feeling at peace, healthy and balanced? That they also are trying to avoid pain and suffering in their own lives? Then, we can explore what happens when we enhance the quality of our participation in our lives? How do our actions contribute to enhancing the quality of life wherever we are?

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This is an excerpt from the book Unravel the thread: Applying the ancient wisdom of yoga to live a happy life

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